My first experience of an Indian wedding was unforgettable. The first word that comes to mind when thinking of an Indian wedding is excess. From the number of functions to the quantity of food and drinks that were consumed and the amount of jewellery that was worn, they were all in excess. Each function was more extravagant than the last with the ladies laden with heavy gold each time. As though they thought that their jewellery was their armour and the wedding functions their battleground.

Coming from Toronto, Canada, for my cousin's wedding I didn't really know what to expect, as it was the first time I had seen most of my relatives in over a decade. And I was prepared for the worst. My friends in Toronto, who knew I would be a fish-out-of-water in India, had cautioned me that this would be the perfect opportunity for aunties who would be looking for suitors for their daughters, and I was warned to be on my best behaviour. "One wrong move, such as getting a little too friendly with a bridesmaid", they said, "and I would be introducing my brother back in Canada to his new bhabhi". Whether they were pulling my leg or not, I still don't know. After all, I was there for my cousin's wedding and the thought of looking for a bride for myself had never even crossed my mind.

Compared to the general Indian wedding in Canada, which is a simple service at the Gurudwara in the morning, followed by a reception or banquet in the evening, the local Indian style of marriage is more of an event rather than anything else. It is one week of non-stop drinking, dancing and partying, followed by four lavas, (which is the actual marriage ceremony and takes about 20 minutes to complete), and tears during the doli.

I was the sarbala (or best man) for the wedding and had no clue what I was getting into. My first task was to help give the groom a bath of milk and rosewater (which I was told was to cleanse him), along with a dozen aunties and uncles, two photographers, and an enthusiastic cameraman, who didn't believe in the concept of privacy. There's always the one uncle at every wedding who has to be at the forefront of everything, and it was just too bad for my cousin that he happened to have a particular zest for this ceremony. He was adamant that everyone was to take an active part in the cleansing process. A few people took him seriously, and were getting a little too familiar while scrubbing my cousin. Afterwards I was told that the main job of the sarbala was not to let the groom out of my sight from that point onwards, until the wedding ceremony (I guess this tradition stems from the fact that somewhere down the line a few grooms got cold feet and took off before the big day). I was also told that if I did lose track of him, my marriage would be cursed.

Once it was known that I was the sarbala, and that too from Keh-neigh-da, I was sought after by every aunty for her daughter. One aunty even encouraged her daughter to steal my right shoe, as part of some clever tradition on the girls' side to con the groom out of some money. From the tikka ceremony to the barat, to the exchange of garlands, where the bride successfully tamed my cousin into obediently lowering his head for easy access, it was all very foreign to me but had a majestic aura that was steeped in tradition.

Another function was the mehendi ceremony before the wedding. What I liked about the custom is that the bride had the groom's name tattooed on her hand, cleverly hidden amidst the mehendi design. I was told that my cousin, the groom, had to find his name on her hand during the wedding night. I figured this was a great way to ease the tension during the wedding night, especially if the couple didn't know each other that well.

The million-dollar question now is whether I will opt for such a lavish wedding. The answer is "Yes!". It's fun, you get tons of attention, people go out of their way to accommodate you, and you get pampered to a fault. You also get a whole lot of gifts and all the events make it so much more interesting, especially for someone who has not been exposed to the culture much.