Anaita Subedar's opinion, an inter-cultural relationship can mean a lot
of enrichment and excitement.
Crossroads is where you stand at when you're part of an inter-caste or
inter-cultural relationship. Crossroads, because there are so many choices
to make. Crossroads, because not all roads lead to where you want to be,
except for one, and so it is important to ensure you set foot on the right
When you come from two different cultures, it's like two different worlds
coming together. They could either collide and explode into the pitless
nothingness of numbing pain, or could merge into one universe of eternal
So, am I talking compromise? No. I'm talking respect, I'm talking adjustment.
To compromise is having to make do, to respect is to understand, if not
necessarily accept. Not substitute, but add. And when you come from culturally
diverse backgrounds there is so much more than can enrich that relationship
as compared to the more conventional ones.
It's a lifetime of amusement - right from laughing over diverse childhood
anecdotes which taught the same lessons or preparing your favourite dish
using methods your grandma abandoned; or just learning each other's lingo
and all the hilarious mispronunciations that follow! And on a more insightful
level, there is an underlying element of continuous education which rounds
off your personality as an individual, as well as a unit.
You are exposed to points of view and mental planes of a collective subconscious,
as foreign to you as intriguing. And there could be major platforms of
arguments because it is so much easier to run back to the shade of beliefs,
rather than accept those contradicting yours, because acceptance could
instigate change and no one is ever prepared enough for change!
But it doesn't have to be like that - not if you can help it! You can
always add new ideologies without relinquishing your own. The growth via
the synchronisation of two different realms can lead to an incomparable
atmosphere of sharing and loving.
So his mother doesn't think too much of your "working woman" identity
and feels violated even acknowledging the fact that you are non-vegetarian.
So her father breaks into an allergy knowing that you drink and can't
stop comparing you to the other guy who's an engineer.... but hey! You're
the one in love, that makes it all worth it.
Add that inherent exotica to your relationship, appreciate that which
comes from your mate, and you'll know you made the right choice on the
Crossroads of life.