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Wording,
addressing and sending invitations can be tricky business. Go
through these Q's and you'll find pointers and simple solutions
to solve your Invitations dilemma.
Q.
How far in advance should I send in the invitations?
A. At the very latest, guests (from out-of-town) should
receive invitations four to six weeks in advance, while in-station
guests should receive it three weeks before the big day.
Q.
Our wedding is taking place in my fiance's village. And we know
our friends and colleagues (a thousand miles away from the wedding
city) aren't going to attend it. So we're not sure whether to
send an invitation or just make an announcement. We're afraid
that we'll hurt many by not inviting them, at the same time we
know many would be unable to make it.
A.
Even if you're sure certain guests won't be able to attend the
wedding, it would be a nice gesture just to invite them -- you
never know, they might decide to attend. And if not, they'll feel
good knowing that they were invited. Announcements should be used
to let friends and possibly professional colleagues who were not
invited to the wedding for whatever reason -- budget constraints,
etc. -- know that the wedding took place. Invitations are sent
to those people whom the families want at the wedding.
Q.
We are paying for our own wedding expenses. So we would like the
invitation to indicate that we are the hosts. At the same time
we don't want to hurt our parents by not indicating their names
as the co-hosts. What is the best way to word this?
A.
You may consider this:
Anjali
Kapoor and Sanjay Singh
together
with their parents
Shalini and Lalit Kapoor
and
Manju and Surinder Singh
request the honor of your presence
etc.
Q.
Me and my fiance have decided to inform our guests, that we do
not expect any wedding gifts. Do you think I should tell them
that personally. Or should I mention it in my invite. If it's
the latter, how should I word it?
A.
Telling them personally can get very cumbersome. You'll be spending
more time replying to their replies. The best way out, mention
it in your invite. Here are two interesting alternatives to the
"No Gifts Please":
"Your
presence is our gift. We kindly request no other."
"We would be delighted and honoured if, instead of a gift,
you were to make a donation to your favourite charity as your
blessing to us."
Q.
My good friend lives with his parents. I have also known his parents
since years. Should I give the parents a separate invite?
A.
You have raised a pertinent question. Elders like to be treated
specially and you should make all attempts to give them the card
personally. It may be a little impractical or even unnecessary
to give your friend and his parents separate cards; best way,
address the invitation to the head of the family and his members.
If your friend's father's name is Mr R.S. Iyer you can address
it asMr
R.S. Iyer and family.
Alternatively, Mr and Mrs R.S. Iyer,
below which you can write Sunil Iyer.
Q.
I will be posting my 300 wedding invites shortly. But I've suddenly
realised that I'm unsure with titles. Please help me.
A.
Here is a breakdown:
A
married couple:
Mr. and Mrs. Raj Parekh
A married couple in which the woman has
kept her name: Ms. Neeta Kumar and Mr. Raj Parekh
Husband is a Colonel: Colonel and
Mrs. D.K. Sabharwal
If the spouse is a Doctor and her husband
is not a doctor: The spouse with the professional title
is listed first. Outer envelope: "Dr. Anjali Banerjee (top
line), Mr. Arun Banerjee" Or, "Dr. Anjali Banerjee and
Mr. Arun Banerjee" (if it fits on one line). The inner envelope
would read: "Dr. Banerjee and Mr. Banerjee" or "Dr.
and Mr. Banerjee."
Do
your home work in advance to get the initials and designations
right. A Colonel likes to be known as a Colonel and not "Mr".
The same goes for a Dr.
Q.
Can I use labels to write the names and addresses on my wedding
invites.
A.
Affixing labels to your wedding invitation envelops makes them
appear far less personal than they should be. Even if you are
inviting many guests to the wedding, hand-address the invitation
or, budget permitting, hire a calligrapher to handle the project.
In
case you need to write the complete address for a large number
of invites, use an outer envelope to place the complete invite.
Etiquette does say that you should *never* print addresses with
a computer, but always handwrite the outer envelopes too. So get
all your close friends (who have a legible handwriting of course)
to pool in by writing addresses for the outer envelope. Request
your artist friend to hand-write the guests names in the inner
envelopes.
If
you are worried about not being able to complete a large number
of invitations, plan to order them as early as you can so you'll
have enough time to finish them. |