We are inundated with countless opinions on love — what it is, how to know if you have it, who is allowed to celebrate it, when it is or isn’t appropriate, and where to find it.
It’s as if we must all wait, shrouded in the dark until a spark is lit, bursting into flames, illuminating our entire lives. But love sometimes creeps up on you – a slow burn that begins gently, slowly spreading its glow across the room. It seems to happen when you’re your most authentic self – your truth attracting another’s truth.
WeddingSutra spent a magical Monday afternoon in Delhi with Khemraj and Pasha, whose love story began gently. From two different cultures, Pasha is Russian, Khemraj is Indian, the two have faced hurdles and fought against the odds to make their relationship work. The couple shared their intimate moments and thoughts about love and all it takes.
How did you two meet?
Khemraj: “We first saw each other two and a half years ago at a gym. We took it very slow, interacting casually and eventually, one thing led to another. When you’re engaging in an activity that is good for you, something you’re passionate about and you meet someone who is on the same wavelength it’s not like meeting someone in a nightclub. One of our priorities is to be healthy and we’re so glad we met in this unconventional way.”
When are your happiest moments?
Pasha: “When you have similar values and ideas, relationships tend to blossom. I think our happiest moments together are just very chill moments. Hanging out and doing casual stuff, sharing personal feelings, being really open with each other. ”
What’s the most annoying aspect of each other?
Khemraj: “She’s very stubborn and just won’t listen to anyone once she has made up her mind to do something.”
Pasha: “As much as I adore his sense of humor, it sometimes gets to me. Especially when I’m trying to be serious about something.”
Who has the best sense of humor?
Khemraj: “That would definitely be me!”
Pasha: “Yes, no doubt it’s him. He’s always cracking these silly jokes and making me laugh. He always manages to find something funny in any situation. Having a sense of humor has helped him breeze through the toughest periods in his life. I personally believe it is desirable and attractive because just like optimism, not everyone has it, but everyone desires it.”
Has communication ever been a barrier for you two?
Pasha: “Just like any relationship, the thing that binds interracial couples like us together, and what helps us bridge the divides we face, is having the same values and shared vision of life. Despite having different origins, upbringing, and heritage, our values are aligned and verbal communication plays a secondary role in this. Our priorities all align and that’s what makes it work. We never really have issues with the language barrier.”
Khemraj: “If we have anything to share, we try our best to speak about it rather than avoiding it. Coming from two different cultures, it is often assumed that communication becomes a barrier which surprisingly isn’t the case with us.”
How did your friends and family react to your relationship?
Khemraj: “Everyone supported our relationship. It did take some by surprise a little bit but things fell right in place after some time.”
Any advice to other couples out there?
Khemraj: “All couples will have some differences and can learn to manage and resolve these. When a relationship has interfaith, intercultural or interracial issues, learning to approach difference in a constructive way is especially important.”
Pasha: “Communication is key to a healthy relationship and it’s even more important when you come from two different backgrounds. Relationships have special challenges, but also special rewards for those who are willing to manage differences in core beliefs not only with their partners but also with their families, communities and society at large.”
#LoveWithoutBorders is our latest editorial series. In a world that is getting increasingly polarised, we are shining the spotlight on couples and love that conquers all – caste, religion, distance, disapproval, gender and every other man-made borders. If you have a wonderful love story that conquered borders, please email us at firstname.lastname@example.org
Location: Dear Garden, Hauz Khas Fort, Lighthouse Cafe
Photography: Infinite Memories